Chicago Chronicle

Dirty Tricks: IFL General Managers Caught Spying

Wrigleyville – First time IFL General Manager Bill Saveley and members of his team, The Rogers Park Rumble, had a May 9th meeting at the Salt and Pepper diner at 3537 North Clark Street, just down the block from the ImprovOlympic Theatre . "Everything was going great, and then Craig Cackowski and Jason Chin just happened to show up" said irate GM Bill Saveley.

Wrigleyville GM Jason Chin

The Rogers Park Rumble team was going over their strategy and deciding on a form when rival GM Craig Cackowski (of the Andersonville team in the Del League) walked into the Salt and Pepper diner dressed in a long trenchcoat and sunglasses. He was also carrying a mini-cassette recorder hidden in a gutted out hardcover book.

"It was weird. We were over in a corner. He could have sat anywhere, but he sat at the stool on the counter right next to us" remarked a visibly shaken Lauren Glass.

Mr. Cackowski's cover was blown due to his unmistakable laugh and the tape recorder falling out of his book and onto the floor. When confronted on his obvious spy tactic, Mr. Cackowski replied "So, working on a monologue opening?" as if to change the subject.

"He was so arrogant. We busted him, yet he sat at the counter and ate his cobb salad like nothing happened!" said a tearful Zach Ward. An unconsoleable Mr. Ward was taken to nearby Thorek Hospital for a battery of tests before being released. He bravely took the stage as a member of Local 914 an hour-and-a-half later, but was still a little spooked by the entire incident.

Immediately after the Cackowski incident, Wrigleyville GM Jason Chin walked into the restaurant and attempted to bust up the meeting with bootleg copies of Attack of the Clones and Lord Of The Rings on DVD.

"How did you get a copies of AOTC and LOTR on DVD you criminal!" screamed an angered Ben Wilke. Members of the Rogers Park Rumble and regular-paying customers started to circle a surprised Jason Chin before he left in a brimstone smelling cloud of smoke, giggling like a schoolgirl yelling "We're all gonna cuddle on my couch Saveley, and you're not invited."

An official complaint against tampering was filed late Thursday night with IFL Commissioner Decatur Hilltop Griggs. Mr. Cackowski could not be reached for comment.